Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Please bail out the developers! My mind has been clouded by unimportant details!

The men who purchased the goodly land known as Parkland deserve to be bailed out.

For the past few months I've been spending my free time telling my friends and neighbors about the environmental destruction that building outside the UDB would bring. I've been talking about building within two miles of the Everglades and the precedent it would set. Flooding and inadequate roads have been mentioned. I've worried about traffic clogging Kendall Drive.

But I was missing the most important point of all! Miami's nobility: Patrick Gleber, Sergio Pino and Rodney Barreto, among others, are what really counts in all this! You see, they took a risk when they purchased land at inflated values outside of the area they were permitted to build on.

Are we going to let them lose some of their hard-earned millions just because of a real-estate crash? Are we going to give up on our esteemed Lords and Nobility just because the stock market has fallen? Bah!

I'm ashamed of myself. Just like our worthless forebearers from the Middle Ages, the serfs, we are nothing without the Lords of the Manor. In my ignorance, I have forgotten how petty and inconsequential I am. Since we don't have any crops to give to Sire Pino and Sire Barreto (we don't need agriculture when we can grow sub-divisions!), the least we can do is let them do whatever they want with their land.

In the spirit of forgiveness, I feel they should be able to deduct our tax money directly into their off-shore bank accounts.

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